Next Time Imma Have to Pass

so there's something wrong with me and the drs. are not quite sure what it is. so they gots me doing all kinds of tests and well i am sorta getting tired of being the human guinea pig. i am not stressed but i am overwhelmed. i just want to get this over already. tell me what i need to know. am i going to die? and if so, how much longer i gots to put up with all these idiotic people who keep trying to infringe on my happiness. i got a list of peeps i want to tell off right proper.. lol..

anyways a couple of weeks ago, i went to the doctor and he couldn't tell me if my kidneys were failing so he scheduled me for this new in and out surgical procedure..and well i was so in my feelings about him not being able to tell me what was wrong with me right then and there that i tuned him out about what he was going to do to me next.

big mistake

so friday i went and when i tell you that this was the most embarassing position i have yet to put myself in, believe it.. why was my twat in the air like it was some big screen. i got four peeps peering down into it while i got all these wires and whatnot coming from it and my rectum... believe me you when i tell you i was not a happy camper... i was sitting there looking at the dr like "forreal, is this what you had in mind? forreal?" and as if that wasn't bad enough, the grand finale just took it to another level. i had to sit on a toilet and pee...yes i said it. i had to pee for everybody in the room

now funny, i have had peeps pee while i am in the room, but typically they would be drunk so they wouldn't care and wouldn't even be aware that other people were in the room. i wasn't drunk. i am sitting there like "forreal, i gots to sit on this toilet and pee..for real? is this how all this is going to play out?"

i don't know about you but i am not too particular about letting people know that when i pee it sounds like the Hoover Dam has sprung a leak.. and then the lil nasty attitude nurse gonna come yank the wires and cords and whatnots out of me... "forreal is that how you gonna treat my body...just yank these things that are embedded in my uterus and my bladder and my anus and my whatever... just yank them right out?"

if i wasn't in so much pain and so disgusted with the entire thing i think i would have tried to beat somebody down. and to think i was feeling sorry that the previous patient had pissed on the doctor... i hope she got him good!