The "Death"saver

So I told myself that i would always go with my gut feeling, especially when it involved my child after my first and only car accident. The lil one was six months and I was picking him up from daycare in Foxy, the hoopty that kept it real.

I was tired and feeling lazy when i picked him up. If anyone has had to place a child in a carseat, you know that the contraption can take darn near twenty minutes to get the child situated for a five minute ride. I was going to just place him in the seat without strapping him down because we were going right home, which was all of five blocks away. Something told me,"strap that baby in or you will regret it." So i strapped the big head child in and hopped behind the wheel and proceeded to try and buck my usual U so i could be on my marry way back to the crib. However, due to the recent snowfall, cars were inching along when they should have been keeping with the flow of traffic; therefore, i couldn't buck my U. I would have to go the long way around to go back in the direction i needed to go.


I made my right at the corner and a right at the next. Went down two blocks and stopped at the stop sign. I had a decision to make, i could either proceed down to the next block and cross the four lane street or i could make a right go to the light, make a left and be stuck at that light for about ten minutes and then go the final two blocks home. the line of cars to the right of me made me proceed straight ahead, but my gut kept saying turn right. Even when i got to the corner with the stop sign, my gut kept saying turn around and go back, so what if you get caught at the eternal light. But i was already there and the traffic was light, i could make it. The car to the left of me on the road i needed to cross had its turning lights on making it seem as if they were going to turn on the street i was currently on, but i wasn't going to take any chances until it looked like they were decreasing speed. i hoped they were because the coast was clear for the two lanes that i would have to cross with traffic going in the opposite direction. the car started slowing down with enough time for me to proceed out into the street and with enough time for the car behind it to notice that it was 1. slowing down and 2. turning.


Well, there i am, in the middle of the street blocking the traffic on my side getting ready to cross the final two lanes when the car i was watching turns on the street i was on;however, the moron behind him was on the phone and wasn't paying attention and to avoid running into them jumps lanes and runs right into me. the impact not only spun me three times but caused my car to catch on fire. all the while i am saying to myself,"if this was a new car, i would be dead." Oddly enough, when the firefighters got there, they told me the same thing.


So long after the firefighters pointed out that i needed to exit Foxy because she had flames shooting from her, i had refused to leave because 1. i hadn't realized that she was on fire and 2. they couldn't get my child out of the carseat and i wasn't going anywhere until i had him in my arms.


so as i sat there looking at all the confusion i couldn't help but thank God that i had properly strapped my baby in his seat and be sad that i didn't listen to my gut. All of this could have been avoided if i had just made that other right turn and went the way my gut was telling me. After that, i said i would always listen to my gut when it came to my child.



Sadly to say, today, i once again did not listen to my gut feeling and almost had to pay dearly.


My son was being a poor sport and refused to share his Weebles with the little girls from down the hall. Now mind you, we had just left their apartment where he played with all of their Bratz dolls and GameBoy plus or advantage or whatever the hell it is. so to defuse the situation, i told him to put his toys in the bathtub while i went and go him a piece a candy. This was a big hit for him because he loves candy and i love NOT to give it to him. Unfortunately, all of the soft candy was gone so i had to give him a candycane or a lifesaver. i have enough stains on my carpet from him slobbing the juices from the candycanes so i decided to give him a lifesaver. Now while i was giving it to him, my brain was like "don't". But i was like they give them to him at school so it should be okay. My brain was like "atleast break it up for him." but for some reason, i didn't. When i handed him the candy, my brain was like "stay in the bathroom with him while he eats it" i left out and continued picking up my stuff in the living room. I tell you it was not two minutes later he comes out of the bathroom eyes real big with water coming from them, color slightly changing and he is making this weird noise letting me know that he is choking on that dang ole lifesaver. i grab him up all the while my mind is racing, do i the heimlick or do i do it like he is still an infant...so i first try bringing it up by doing upward compressions on his abdomen/ribcage but every time i do this, blood and some other gook shots out. No candy. i keep asking him to talk to me and he just coughs and grabs at his throat. i try again and still no candy, just blood. I shout to the girls to call 911 and they stay put playing in my son's room. So this time i yell with a tone that says if someone don't move now and fast, it will be hell to pay, and they come a running. All the while, i am flipping the lil one upside down and begin beating on his back. My bloody gook, no candy. I hit again and the same result but this time he shouts out "Mommy" and i know he is okay. the girl who called 911 tells me they are on the phone and gives it to me (she had called them and said nothing to them, no my neighbor's child is choking, nothing. she just breathed in the operator's ear) i told the lady that it was okay, i was calling because my son was choking on some candy and i couldn't get it out but he was fine now. she asked me if i was sure just as i spotted the Deathchoker on the floor. I told here yeah, the candy had came out and hung up the phone. I looked at my son and simply said, "No more candy for you." He said "okay, hug me."

and i did. all the while thinking, never again will i not follow my gut feeling when it comes to him because i can't take much more.